Wednesday, February 27, 2008
9:17 PM

WOW.
Its been really long since I've had to do a layout with FRAMES. Or iframes. Whatever. Hm.
Shall have to go refresh my memory.

Went through an annoying number of drafts for the Mardi Gras website today...
Still have to do the banners and posters.


There are some days you just feel like you've had enough of the world. Of the pessimism that exists around you. And thats when you just throw yourself back into the safety of God's arms and everlasting love.

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Tuesday, February 26, 2008
10:50 PM

"Springtime for Hitler" from The Producers is running through my head.
I love that movie, its crazy.

Anyway, the coalition of relief teachers' attempt at a movie marathon yesterday was quite amusing. With Kee Meng's obsession with war/tragedy, Auli's desire for romance/humour, Maryam's fascination for horror and my need for brainless or fantastical movies, we made quite an awesome foursome. Then Mifa turned up and was utterly aghast at our choice. :P

So in the end, we got Babel because 1) none of us had watched it before and hence could not veto it and because 2) it amusing ended up having uh, several elements of everything.

Except the humour.
What a long Arthousy film.

Very thought provoking, I must say. Quite well executed.
But I don't think I could sit through Babel a second time.


Muses...

Why, do tell me, why is it that we are taught not to dream?
Why are we more enlightened about what we CANNOT do than what we CAN?
Why?

Why does cynicism exist? Why do we choose to give up our pursuits?
Why do we likewise tell others not to dream because we have given up our dreams?

What makes adults any wiser about the world just because they never succeeded in becoming the artist, musician, photographer, writer or movie star their youths wanted to be?

What makes them say 'No you cannot do it' just because they did not even try?

What makes you think of the 99 who fail you won't be the 1 who succeeds?
What gives you the right to make yourself one of the 99?
Do you think the one who finally succeeds would have ever succeeded if he told himself he would be just like those who failed?

Sure not everyone succeeds. For every individual who manages to scale that ladder in the name of Art there are those who have have never even taken the first step. But why can't you be that one? Why NOT?

What gives someone else the right to determine that you cannot survive being an artist?

"Love cannot be taught."
What is life to an artist without his art?

"To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe." - Anatole France

Why do we teach the young to be jaded just because we are jaded too?
What gives you the right to determine their future even before they step into it?

I'm not angry, but it is definitely frustrating.
How easily we succumb.

"If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that courage to be, that quality that helps you go on in spite of it all. And so today I still have a dream." - Martin Luther King Jr

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Thursday, February 21, 2008
10:54 PM

EVERYBODY.
SAY HI TO MY NEW TUMBLER.



The colour doesn't turn out that well but the one on the left is really an olive kinda green and its really pretty. I mean, green + butterflies = how can lizzy not get it??

But I really liked the one on the right too. Was deciding between the two but got both in the end cause Jason's going to take the other one. Lol.

Pretty. :)

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Wednesday, February 20, 2008
10:04 PM

Well well well.
It's been an interesting day.
But before we get to that, here's some pictures that Zhaoey finally uploaded from Rene's birthday celebrations.





@Ministry of Food (Marina Square)





@ Timbre



From left: WY, Zhaoey (in green), Rene, Lizzy, Han, Von.

Loves. :)

And today was another lovely day....

Well, until Maryam lost her wallet. We'd gone to Central @ Clarke Quay after lunch for some (window) shopping, but ended up lazing in Starbucks because it just totally felt like a good day/time for lazing... when Maryam realized she didn't have her wallet with her.

Only Maryam can lose her wallet, be dramatic, and still make it into the funniest incident ever. Shall not go into details because all I can remember doing the entire time as we made our trip from Central back to Bedok (which we left not so very long to go to Central) was laughing unnecessarily.

Anyway, we got back to the food centre at Bedok, and my limited Chinese vocabulary was employed to speak to the uncle who ran the drink stall that was closest to the table we were sitting at... and LO AND BEHOLD! He had indeed picked up her wallet, and promptly returned it to her... after taking several agonizing moments to remember where he stowed it while Maryam, Amitha and I held our breaths in anxious anticipation.

Well, I know its very easy to say what I am about to say now that her wallet HAS been retrived, but the entire time from the moment she realized it was gone when we were in Starbucks @ Central to the time we got it back in Bedok, I just knew that we were going to get it back. Because the prayer I often pray in the morning comes back to me - my friends are blessed because I'm blessed. And I'm blessed because God loves me. I pray that my friends will be blessed out of the OVERFLOW of Daddy's love in my life, and therefore things like that should NOT happen. I was angry, not with any human being but with the devil for trying to pull a fast one. But my identity is IN Christ, and I know WHOSE I am. You wouldn't want to try messing with my God. :)

Well anyway, on to lighter things...

THE NEW RANGE OF STARBUCKS TUMBLERS ARE OUT AND I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM!

*heartssssssss*

Have been using Ice Mountain bottles since Auli accidentally dropped my old tumbler sometime in January... but the tumblers earlier this season were most unappealing to me.

The new ones were launched on Monday (according to my good friend Boo) and they are... *drumroll* GREEN. GREEEEEEEEEN. GREEEEEEEEEEEEN. Okay. Mild obsession, very mild, really.

And they have orange butterflies on them. Its PERFECT. It was made just for me. I know it. =X
Haha. But yes, I really do love it. Going to buy it tomorrow. And getting one for Jason too, another one that I really liked. Er, its green too, of course. Lalala.

Anyway, here's a happy picture. The only downside is that Mifa isn't in it.

From left: John, Lizzy, Maryam, Kee Meng, Auli

Precious, precious people. :)

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Monday, February 18, 2008
9:53 PM

Had a rather lovely Monday.
I really thank Jesus for every single little detail he weaves so smoothly into my life... like an awesome Monday timetable for example...

And for the fabulous friends I've found at my job. I know we can be loud and rowdy and I apologise for any trauma/irritation we've caused.. but we really love what we're doing and do take it seriously. Today as we were chilling out during lunch, having 2 hours of brainless fun in Settler's Cafe and having a nice relaxing best-ban-mian-ever dinner, I realize I really do have God to thank for just putting everything so nicely into place, and I choose to believe that He's done it all for me just because He loves me. :)

*insert warm fuzzy feeling here*

Awesome, really awesome. I just sit back and reflect on how God has placed these people in my life, on how He has just made everything work out for my good..

Quoting a Steven Curtis Chapman song, I'm "covered with the fingerprints of God". :)

In fact, the song has really lovely lyrics, so here they are.


Steven Curtis Chapman - Fingerprints
I can see the tears filling your eyes
And I know where they're coming from
They're coming from a heart that's broken in two
By what you don't see
The person in the mirror
Doesn't look like the magazine
Oh, but when I look at you it's clear to me that...

I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know it's true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God

Never has there been and never again
Will there be another you
Fashioned by God's hand
And perfectly planned
To be just who you are
And what He's been creating
Since the first beat of your heart
Is a living breathing priceless work of art and...

Just look at you
You're a wonder in the making
Oh, and God's not through, no
In fact, He's just getting started and…



Yep. You know, regardless of what you think you are, I just want you to know that God sees you perfect. He sees the PERFECTION of the finished work of Jesus, He sees the blood that Christ has already shed for you, and He sees you IN Christ. Means He sees you absolutely blemish free. :)

You are not worthless. In fact, you are worth everything. You are worth far more than you can ever begin to imagine. So don't waste this God-given life.

In our fallen world today, many people are losing sight of their own personal worth. Why are so many people, so many youths, heedlessly taking their lives, giving up their virginity, taking drugs, ruining their bodies, giving up hope... because they do not see how precious they are. They do not realize how precious they are. They do not see their WORTH. They do not see that they are the precious pearl that Jesus gave up EVERYTHING to save. That when He hung there on the cross it wasn't just for 'us'. It was for ME. For Elizabeth Lee Mei Chieh, who has taken the wrong roads, strayed down the wrong paths, and sometimes wilfully, stubbornly chosen to do PRECISELY what God said NOT to do. It was for this Christ died.

YOU are worth far more than what you think defines you. Because you will never understand how much you are worth until you realize how much God loves you. And when you know how much you're worth, you won't give up your life so easily, or your virginity, or your virtue and values. Because you know you're SO above that, that you don't need to give those up to prove anything to anyone. And it sets you free to live.

There's a difference between existing and living.
Don't just exist.

Live.

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Saturday, February 16, 2008
11:40 PM

Been trying to clear out the stuff I've accumulated from my former days.

Took out the entire box of CDs and and the bag of magazines...
And promptly gave up.

Well really, does anyone really want Point Break's Apocalyptic CD or Westlife's Greatest Hits or Britney Spears' Oops I Did it Again??

And those are the least of my pile.. I mean there's another mini pile of Gackt CDs and the painfully large stack of old jrock magazines with Dir en Grey, Naitomea, Pierrot and whatever not on the covers... along with those large full page spreads of the bands inside.. Miyavi.. BLAHBLAHBLAH...

And there's the Moonchild photobook which cost me close to SGD$100.. or was it more? Can't remember... and another Malice Mizer photobook.. and more more more Gackt photobooks.. BLEH.

Okay, yes, if anyone is interested, please ask me NOW. Cataloging has proven to be quite a challenge, so it'll be easier if you tell me bands/singers you're interested in and I'll see what I have. :S

I'm selling/giving everything at ridiculously low prices so please tell me if you want stuff. The entire jrock related collection is probably worth at least $500 or close to a thousand I'm not sure and I don't think I really want to calculate and find out.

So if you want it, please tell me cause I want it out now that I'm done spring-cleaning. *pokes Dotty*

What else what else..
Oh yes, random BSB/Boyzone/Britnet/Bardot/Hanson/etcetcetc CDs too.
I'm too sheepish to go down the list.

I don't know if I'll be getting rid of my anime VCDs... but I do have Prince of Tennis manga vol. 1 to 16 (or was it 22) that I don't want anymore and will be willing to sell for $10. (Note that the paper isn't new and will probably be the ChuangYi shade of yellow) And the Prince of Tennis VCD vol. 1 as well.. do message me if you're interested, everything is negotiable.. :P


Rawr. Yes. Help Lizzy get rid of the superfluous things that are still unfortunately in her possession. Thank you.

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Wednesday, February 13, 2008
8:11 PM

Happy photos from my birthday.
Those from Rene's (whose birthday is on Friday but we celebrated yesterday) haven't come in yet.












I love these people. :)


And I miss the ones below.





Idly, I realize that we'll never don the puke green uniform again, not officially, that is.
No matter how much we've complained about it... well, it's still part of the identity that has shaped and defined us for the past 2 years, and continues to trigger all the memories that we've come to associate with this school. And how plentiful these memories are.

I'm happy with what I'm doing now.
Its just that sometimes I wish I could do so much more for them.

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Sunday, February 10, 2008
11:05 PM

Hello. Am quite sleepy now although I suppose I do have quite a lot on my mind I wish to say.

It has been another whirlwind weekend. All weekends are, these days. Coveted days with which you attempt to spend as much time with your NS boyfriend as you possibly can.

I used to find it difficult to believe Agnes when she told me that 'In uni, almost everyone is attached.' But I'm not even in uni and I'm starting to find that it is already true.

Perhaps I've led a sheltered life, where the ones with boyfriends or girlfriends were a minority, but I really dislike fitting the mould and being 'one of those' people who are foolishly attached at 19.

And now I find out for the 2nd time in 6 months that a friend who is but 21 years of age is getting married. It is quite a giddying thought.

I'll say more tomorrow when I'm feeling more coherent.

For now, the bed beckons. Goodnight.

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Saturday, February 09, 2008
12:04 PM

Time for some camwhoring!

Yes Happy CNY everyone, hope you've had your fill of ba kwa, pineapple tarts and whatever your favourite CNY goodie may be...



The CUTEST. MOST ADORABLE. cousin. Ever. *loves*




And the dog of another cousin. It's the most obedient, nua dog I have ever met. If I had a dog, I want one like that. The nua nua type.

And thats about it. :x
I've to go meet Mr Bala and the rest of the History bunch soon...
Hualalala...

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Tuesday, February 05, 2008
1:15 PM

Darling sent flowers to the school. One day late, but still. :)
Loves.

Anyway, didn't blog earlier on about The Incident That Happened on my Birthday.

Basically, the other relief teachers had been running near my place, and we got back to my place close to 7.00PM, which was the time I was going to meet my 4/6 friends.

So anyway, I was an hour late and only got to Central around 8.00PM. Took 12, which I should have just stayed on because from Lavender it goes all the way straight down to Central.

But nooooooooooooo I decided to be smart, get off, and cab from Lavender, which turned out to be like the biggest mistake ever because it was waaaaaaaaaaaaaay slower than 12, and the best part was that the cab driver didn't even know where the darn building was, and I made him drop me off somewhere much further down in some ulu-ated part of Merchant Road.

So there I was, fuming, annoyed, late... on my birthday.... stomping back to Central going crazy over the horrible surcharges and stupid imbecilic cab drivers...

But you know, what I was really angry with, wasn't the surcharge, or the lousy cab driver, or the bad traffic.. but with myself. Angry with myself for getting off the bus, for wasting $7.30 on a cab.... fuming all the way back to Central.

And there I was. Screaming "URGHHHHHHH God that was $7.30!!!" in my head...
And suddenly God just nudged me and gently reminded me. "Hey, that isn't your $7.30. That's My $7.30."

And I just gradually, started to calm down. I really, really, really, really didn't want to be pissed off on my birthday, and I was already feeling a tinge of vague 'emo-ness' as it was. And God just gently reminded me, hey, its okay, it isn't your money you wasted, its mine. And can I not possibly give you more than $7.30?

A lot of the time we get angry in such situations because we blame ourselves for having 'wasted' the money, money that could have been better spent somewhere else. Get angry because we blame ourselves for the stupid little decisions we make that are wrong.

But God is bigger than our mistakes. I got so monstrously riled up over being an hour late and over $7.30. Isn't God BIGGER than TIME and MONEY? Can He not repay my time and money with MUCH MORE? Not just of quantity but of QUALITY?

And I realized... I was slipping into a 'lack' mentality. $7.30 spent on a bad cab equates to $7.30 less to spend on shopping, or saving. And THE turning point that set me free was that, hey, MY GOD IS BIGGER THAN $7.30.

Yes, it was my mistake, it was my fault. But God is bigger and not just bigger, but WILLING to give me MUCH MORE even though I was the one who had messed up.

That is grace. And it gives and it gives and it gives because the work on the cross is finished. His blood has paid it all. God doesn't see my mistakes, He doesn't point a figer when I foul up. He reaches both hands and carries me into His embrace, into His wholeness, into His safe, stable, large and more than sufficient arms.

:)

LOVESSSSSSSSSS.

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Monday, February 04, 2008
11:28 PM

There are some years you enjoy really elaborate, really well celebrated birthdays.

There are other years when you just want a nice, peaceful quiet little catch-up with some jolly good old friends.

This is one of those other years.

And I enjoyed it, very much. :)
In a quiet, rather uncharacteristic sorta way with no pomp and circumstance whatsoever.

Thank you, to everyone who has wished me Happy Birthday, starting with Joel (Ng) up to Andrea (who has insofar, been last) and for those special people who have made this day even more memorable for me.

The ones who gave me Larry the cowsheep and the ones who bought me dinner, cake and gave me a lovely angpow. The ones who tried to surprise me at lunch and I was really touched by. :)

Thank you Jesus.

You know, He just knows what I need, when I need it. Like when I was Sec4, I probably needed it then. The big celebrations and the overwhelming gaiety of it all. I had so much then. And I enjoyed it. Every year my needs are different, and my demands on a birthday are different, and every year God meets them in His own special way.

And I know I'm well loved. And well looked after. :)

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Sunday, February 03, 2008
10:47 PM

Crazy dreams.

In between coughing out army green phelgm and tossing around in bed at 7.00am in the morning, I had two really bizzare dreams that are already beginning to slip from my mind as I recall them.

The first of which took place in an unidentified shopping centre, I can only remember that in it, Leah working in a little fondue shop in the basement. I was meeting Jason who was with another girl. And he was being all cold and uncomfortable around me and refused to hold my hand or talk to me while she was around. And I clearly recall she perfectly suited the profile of females I'm generally disdainful of.

I probably don't even need anyone to do a psycho-analysis of this first dream. :P
Oh ya then the latter part was funnier because I decided to RUN AWAY. Like run, crying all dramatically and all, and I was wearing HEELS. From the shopping centre, which was like in town or something, all the way home. In my heels. Even in my dream, the saner part of my mind was laughing in disbelief.

Okay.
So I dozed in and out of consciousness.
Second dream... GUESS WHAT! A level results. Lol.

Ms Chew was there. It wasn't even in school. The hall was somewhat hall-ish but it definitely wasn't TJ hall. She was telling me how well I did and how a lot of people didn't do well for the A levels this year. And when I looked at it the first thing I saw was a big D. But apparently in my dream the D belonged to my H3 Lit which stood for Distinction. And I got As for everything except Lit which I got B for. And Ms Chew was saying how I got top script for History (who on earth even knows who gets top script for History?). And I was actually pretty pleased with it and the B didn't even bother me at all.

Guess thats why its a dream. LOL.
Oh well. :)

Amusing stuff.

Pastor Mark Hankins preached today and it was such an anointed message. :) Whee.
One more hour to the 19th year of my existence. Wooo.

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Saturday, February 02, 2008
3:40 PM

OMGGGG THE RSAF BEAR IS LIKE SO CUTE.

Sis got it for me (Yes she works at Mindef), they're selling it to get money for charity or something.


Oh they sell serial numbers.. I got 504. Don't ask why.


And it even has this array of little badges!!!
And it says 'Above All' below the airplane. LOL.


The flag and its Captain stripes. And its little sleeve pocket. TOO CUTE.


Another shot of it plus the other badge it came with (left paw), although I can't say I know the significance of either. LOL.

*sucker for all things cute and fluffy*

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Friday, February 01, 2008
12:29 PM

Accoutrement
But lovers are like umbrellas arnt they?
They're like gloves
They cover you up, they keep you warm
They look so good, they fit so nice
they shield you.
Then you leave them on a train
You think 'How did I manage that?'
And 'I didn't like them anyway.'
Or 'I've lost them.'
Marnia

From 'No Bliss Like This', an anthology of love poems compiled by Jill Hollis that Mifa, Maryam and I have been scouring over like hungry insatiable 19 year old girls.

A lot of it is pretty sad and makes me feel pretty jaded.
But good poetry is there to be appreciated.
Hmmm.

Okay, back to work.

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12:07 AM

Went for Switchfoot concert with a giddy head and a frog's voice but the band is AWESOME.
Well, West Grand Boulevard was good too. Got to see these 2 bands twice today since there was the big hype about them being in TJ and all.

Amitha was being such a huge fangirl about it. Quite funny to watch.

Switchfoot rocks for me because I see Jesus in all their songs. Regardless of who is singing to it or whether they realize what they're singing about, every time I hear the songs I know, I know who it was written for, and I see Jesus written so beautifully into these lyrics and tunes, and I can't help but lift my eyes, smile and give Him all the praise that He deserves.

Because at the end of the day, He is still the reason. He is always the reason. And He will always be. I know under most normal circumstances I wouldn't even bother with such concerts, especially those that involve standing-room-only and the dread moshpit.

And I can say the only reason why, is that I can't dance for anyone else. I can't sing for anyone else. I cannot jump to a tune about lost love or how much someone else hates the world. I cannot jump to empty words. Because I have found the only reason worth living for, and it is only for Him that I can give my praise, because dancing, singing, living for Him, is what is truly valuable.

Everything else just pales in comparison, becomes a lousy imitation, when one has seen, felt and truly experienced God's love. :)


These are words that actually mean something. They are not empty words.
They are words that cry out for the void to be filled, a void that the music of the world can only expand but not fill. The void is a vacuum that this world cannot satisfy. As the lyrics of the song Meant To Live go: We want more than this world's got to offer.


Sing to me the song of the stars
Of Your galaxy dancing and laughing
and laughing again
When it feels like my dreams are so far
Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again
- Only Hope (Mandy Moore stole it)

Rumor has it you love me
Rumor has it the world spins upside down
Rumor has it my only hope is you
And the rumors are true
I turn everything over
- I Turn Everything Over

I'm singing Spirit take me up in arms with You
You're raising the dead in me
Oh, oh I am the second man
Oh, oh I am the second man now
Oh, oh I am the second man now
And You're raising the dead in me
- 24

When I'm a broken-hearted man
Complacent and tired
When I've been knocked out of the race
I've been a fool for long enough
To fight it, to fight it
It's in Your arms I find my place

You meet me where I am
Forgive where I am

Where I lose myself in grace
(Where I'm lost and found)
I want to lose myself in grace
Let Your love reign down all over me
Cover me
- You Already Take Me There

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